


The LAPD is Not Paid Enough

by MisteryMaiden



Series: And It All Comes Crashing Down [10]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) is Bad at Feelings, Protective Michael
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 08:07:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27730018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MisteryMaiden/pseuds/MisteryMaiden
Summary: Various snippets of the LAPD reacting to Lucifer and the other angels. All taking place sometimes after Reintroductions.
Series: And It All Comes Crashing Down [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1654117
Comments: 73
Kudos: 362





	1. The Truth About Decker

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally just going to be a quick snapshot interlude, one of the two that I promised would be out while I worked on the next major installment. Then, while I was at work, I got the idea of doing a bunch of these little snippets of the LAPD in relation to Lucifer. Things that wouldn’t fit in the main installments and aren’t deleted scenes. Posting a bunch of quick minifics didn’t really seem like the way to go for this either, so I ended up deciding to put them here, instead. A fic dedicated to a look at the LAPD and how they’re doing with the whole ‘Lucifer is Satan’ thing being common knowledge. 
> 
> First thing I’m going to state right here because I don’t want any mistakes: just because the LAPD is being shown to be accepting and good in this fic does not mean that real life police departments are all secretly misunderstood. I am 100% BlackLivesMatter. I will fight anyone that says that the way the police are run in America is completely right and accurate all of the time.
> 
> My siblings tells me that I should avoid being political in my author’s notes or engaging. I disagree. Being silent about something like this is how it was allowed to go this long in the first place. I don’t know if I’ll touch on things like BlackLivesMatter in my fics, though I might. I don’t know if I’ll lose readers, though if you think the color of your skin makes you better than someone else, I don’t really want your support in the first place.
> 
> I’m mentioning this here because it is relevant to this series. Racism and police brutality are very real, and I’m writing a series that has to do with the police. I won’t talk to you about any of my other politics, unless they become relevant. This is just a warning that I may, at some point, dive into them. Racism is real, white privilege is real, and it is a problem that should not be ignored. And I’m not going to ignore it to cater to a group of people who have been catered to enough. (And I am saying this as as a Caucasian woman, btw.)
> 
> The police are just not equipped to deal with everything that we are entrusting to them. That WILL be showing up in my stories, you have been forewarned. If that isn’t something you’re comfortable with, I wouldn’t recommend reading any of my stories for this series going forward. 
> 
> I hate that I have to say that because this was always something I was planning on including from the start, but with everything being the way it is, I figured putting this warning out now was going to save me a headache in the making. (I will, if it becomes a problem, monitor comments. I don’t think it will because I trust you all, but it is something that I am prepared to do if I need to. I have a zero racism policy.)

In the end, remaining completely silent hadn’t been an option.

Monroe had given out the warning across the precinct: Chloe Decker had cut all ties with Lucifer Morningstar and DO NOT mention her to him unless you want a repeat of the Incident, as it had become known as.

(Apparently, sleep deprivation was just as dangerous to angels as it was to humans.)

For a while, that had been fine. There were more than a few people who read between the lines. Those who whispered about the vial of blood and the distinct bullet necklace that had been found on the scene of Kinley’s ritual. One plus one equaled two and they wrote Chloe Decker off as just another cop that had fallen from their pedestal. Not the first and not the last.

(They tried not to think about that pool of blood or the mesmerizing way Morningstar watched them all interact with him, as if he was waiting for a blow he thought was coming but couldn’t help hoping that _this time_ it would be different.)

(A few homicide detectives promptly started communication with the San Jose office where Decker had transferred, nothing explicit just a warning to keep a careful eye on her. After all, her fiancé had turned out to be a criminal underground mastermind that had also invented murder, which was sure to cause some behavior issues. If they implied that Chloe might not have been as innocent in Pierce’s dealings, well, that would have fewer consequences than letting slip that she’d been working with Kinley. They were just doing their part in keeping this from turning into a war between humanity and angels.)

The cold interactions between Decker, Espinoza, and Lopez made more sense, with that new information.

Not everyone, however, knew the intricate details of what Morningstar and Decker’s relationship had been. Specifically, the rookies.

Sandra Jermano was one such rookie.

Jennifer should have let it go. She’d been there, a new officer to the force, female, and wanting to prove that she was just as good as the men around her. Chloe Decker was _the_ female cop, the proof that gender didn’t decide if you were a good addition to the force. That the more ‘gentle’ of the two genders had just as much to offer as the hotheaded men that dominated the force.

Yeah, she’d been there. Decker had been her hero once too. Then Morningstar was mentioned.

She couldn’t leave it alone, couldn’t let that star-eyed rookie approach the consultant with questions about Decker. In the past, it wouldn’t have been a problem.

Now, Decker was the friend that had drugged him and handed him over to someone that had proceeded to do his best to kill the consultant. Tortured him.

Jennifer couldn’t let this rookie bring Chloe Decker up to Lucifer Morningstar.

She’d grabbed Sandra and her fellow female beat cops and dragged them away from homicide. There were some protests, quieted by Edwards patented glare as her partner followed behind her, face hard as stone.

He’d known just what Jennifer was going to do, probably before Jennifer herself had made the decision. It was both infuriating and endearing that her partner knew her that well.

It was going to make the surprise party for his birthday next month that much harder to plan. Stealth was hard when dealing with someone who knew you this well, honestly.

“What is this about?” Sandra asked, frowning as Jennifer shooed the group into a closed office.

The door shut behind her, and Jennifer took a steadying breath. Edwards had stayed outside, probably to make sure that no one overheard what she was about to say.

“You cannot approach Morningstar about Decker,” she said, voice hard. “Not a word about her to him. No reference to her.”

Sandra frowned at her, as did the rest of the group. “Why not?” the rookie asked, eyes narrowed. Not in fury, or even indignation, but in intense contemplation. As if she was on the brink of putting together something that had been bugging her, which she had only had a few hints for in the past. Jennifer had seen Edwards make the expression.

Huh, Jennifer thought as she studied Sandra’s face. The rest seemed indignant but not this one.

Maybe she should see if Edwards would put in a good word for the rookie if Sandra was doing well in a few months. A hint that she could do well as a detective with some experience.

“Decker was working with Kinley,” she said, flatly as she pushed away that thought. It wasn’t important at the moment.

Silence as the group digested that.

“Oh,” Jermano whispered, face pale. Jennifer wondered if she’d looked like that when Smith had told them just what role Chloe Decker had played in the events that had led to the reappearance of angels within the world.

“Why hasn’t she been arrested?” Amy Benson asked, face furious. “I have a friend in San Jose that says she’s working in homicide there now.”

“Because,” Jennifer said, trying to keep her voice level through her own anger at the injustice of it. “Higher ups decided that we couldn’t risk an innocent verdict because of who Morningstar is. If she’s let go because her victim was the Devil, what do you think the angels would take that as?”

Sandra’s had covered her mouth, the only one that looked terrified as well as understanding. Smart, that one.

Jennifer wondered if she was spending too much time with Edwards. Her thoughts were starting to sound like him now.

“We’ll run interference with the others,” Benson said, face contorted in fury. The same fury that had been in the shoulders of everyone when they first understood what had really happened and why Decker wasn’t sitting behind bars right now.

“Good,” Jennifer nodded. “And make sure none of this gets back to Lucifer. I don’t think anyone has told him we know Decker was involved.”

She waited until the group consented to remain quiet before letting out a sigh of relief.

She knocked on the door, a signal to Edwards that she was coming out. He opened it for her, giving a nod to the group inside.

“Let’s get some lunch,” he said, walking back towards the entrance to the precinct.

Jennifer didn’t say anything as she followed, leaving the angry faces behind her.

It felt like a weight had lifted off her shoulders with that simple conversation. Decker wasn’t going to be prosecuted, she was going to get to keep her job, but Jennifer would be damned, maybe even for real, before she let someone like that keep her reputation.

There were better role models to pick from.

* * *

It hadn’t stopped there. True to their word, the group of female rookies had spread run interference, calmly spreading the word of what Decker had done amongst the female cops who hadn’t been in the know.

Practically overnight, Decker’s name became anathema around the precinct. Those that hadn’t put together her involvement or hadn’t known about the items found at the warehouse, knew everything. The poison, the blood, the bullet, giving out the codes to the door, every detail of her involvement was common knowledge among the cops of the precinct.

If Palmetto had made her an outcast, this made her downright despised.

It wasn’t just because Lucifer Morningstar was well-liked. It wasn’t even because of the repercussions of her actions on the world. It was the betrayal of her partner and the crimes she had committed.

In this line of work, where it was the world against you, your partner was supposed to be the one that you could always rely on. The one person that you knew would always have your back, that you could trust completely. Decker had taken the relationship and spit on it. It wasn’t hard to find information confirming that Morningstar had saved her life more than once, only to find himself poisoned by her hand.

It was nothing short of a miracle that none of the derision made its way back to the consultant. The entire force made sure to keep a single reference to her away from the consultant.

If Dan Espinoza was slightly less aggressive when new rookies walked over to chat with the consultant, no one said a word.

If the bright light that was Ella Lopez started to shine on those that ran interference with the media, who had been trying to get a statement on Chloe Decker and their partnership for weeks, the gifts were accepted with a smug nod of acknowledgment.

If Olivia Monroe found a feather-shaped knife gift-wrapped on her desk, a golden sheen to it, she merely smiled and slipped the knife into a (now slightly less confusing) knife sheath one Mazikeen Smith had all but hit her with the day before.

Life went on without another word on the former golden star of the LAPD mentioned once.


	2. Rules and when they matter 1

Richards let out a tired sigh, trying to force down a headache. “You can’t just wave your hand and magically gain access to previously locked doors, Morningstar.”

Lucifer Morningstar, literal Devil, cocked his head in confusion. His Twin brother, Michael the Sword, merely looked amused. “Why not?” Satan asked, completely baffled. “It’s no longer locked.”

Dear lord, despite the contempt he currently had for the woman, Richards understood that pinched, exasperated look Decker used to carry during conversations with this man. It was only made better with the knowledge that Lucifer really didn’t know what the problem was with, essentially, breaking and entering.

“Because it rates as breaking and entering,” Richards said, trying to keep his voice calm. Once he would have been comfortable snapping at the man. Morningstar had seemed to revel in having heated debates on common life practices with whoever wanted to pick a fight. These days, the entire precinct was terrified that one wrong word would send the man running.

Once bitten, twice shy, as they say.

“I haven’t broken the lock,” the devil said, sounding a little petulant. Was it any wonder that none of them had ever put it together that this man was the actual Devil?

“That’s not the point,” Richards sighed again. “Look. This property does not belong to any of us. That means unless the door was left unlocked by someone who isn’t on the police payroll or if we don’t have cause to believe we are needed inside the premises, we cannot enter without permission of owner or a warrant.”

Lucifer studied him, face looking intrigued now. “Really? I’ve always done this…” Satan trailed off, looking worried suddenly. “Is it really a problem?”

Fucking Hell, pun intended damnit, was Decker blind as well as dumb? How do you explain locked doors mysteriously opening without any sign of a lockpick? That didn’t exactly fit into ‘mind tricks’ like the desire thing could!

“Seeing as supernatural lockpicking wasn’t considered a crime then,” Richards said soothingly, trying to keep the man from panicking. Morningstar knew enough to know that wrongdoing in past cases could get the criminals released. “I think that it’s fine to keep that to ourselves. Just don’t do it again going forewords.”

The way the consultant brightened and agreed told Richards that he’d managed to soothe whatever worry might have come up.

The smile that the twin brother (never would that not be weird) gave him was further reassurance.

* * *

“Okay, so you can supernaturally pick locks with a wave of your hand,” Richards said, later that day as they tried to gain access to a particularly nasty program that was triggered to detonate a bomb in an unknown location (in a _school_ the sick fuck), with only ten minutes left and one try remaining. “How does that work, exactly?”

“I can’t be kept out of anything without God’s direct interference,” the devil answered, frowning at the screen. The red tint in his eyes was a little harder to ignore, now that Richards knew it wasn’t just in his mind. “I don’t see how this relates to what we are doing, Detective Richards.”

Richards kindly ignored the stiffness in Lucifer’s spine at the word ‘detective’.

“You can’t be kept out of anything?” Richards asked, the crazy idea starting to form. “What about electronics? Can you do the hand wave and we’re in with electronics?”

“I don’t know,” Morningstar said, voice stunned. “I’ve never thought to try.”

Raising his hand, Lucifer touched the computer screen. Almost instantly, the screen cleared from the login screen to the desktop home screen. Richards almost shouted with glee as he dove for the keyboard, finding and deactivating the bomb. All with 7 minutes to spare on the counter.

Nearly twenty minutes later the techies arrived, pale faces and breathing heavily. They’d sprinted to the location the moment that Richards had given their location, knowing full well that they would be too late.

“How did you get in?” One asked, looking stunned. He was tapping away at the computer, face growing more and more bewildered. “This was set to internally combust if the right code wasn’t inputted with voice command!”

Richards felt the blood disappear from his face. Even if they had guessed the right code, it wouldn’t have saved those kids.

“Apparently supernatural lockpicking works on electronics too,” he said, looking towards the consultant and his twin, who were slightly talking further away. The tech followed his gaze.

“Think homicide wouldn’t mind loaning him out every once in a while?” the techie asked, sounding absolutely thrilled. “I wanna see if internet passwords apply to that.”

Richards held back a laugh, imagining the stunned look on the man’s face when a bunch of techies eventually managed to corner him. “Wouldn’t hurt to ask,” he said, the stress of the day falling off his shoulders.

At least twenty-seven children could have died that day in the initial blast, with more injured. Some would die later, succumbing to their wounds. All of it stopped because of a consultant that the world was demanding they get rid of. Richards, personally, hadn’t been all that convinced that Morningstar would be of any use on this case. He was considering sending the Chief flowers for her insistence that he take Lucifer with him.

Religion was full of shit. There was nothing evil about the man who had saved all those children.

Guess it was his turn to supply the pudding in the work fridge, then.


	3. Michael

“You have a twin brother.” Olivia Monroe said, looking between the two with the start of a real headache. Other than clothing, the only difference she could tell was the oppressive force of menace that seemed to radiate from the newcomer.

If it had been this one that had claimed to be Satan? Olivia would have believed him immediately. The air in the room was almost choking her as she tried to stamp her panic, (when had she started panicking?!) down.

“I have a twin brother,” Morningstar nodded, looking sympathetic. “Michael, could you tone down the menace? I think you’re going to give her a panic attack.”

The one named Michael, because of _course_ the twin brother of Lucifer Morningstar would be the Archangel Michael, gave him an apologetic look. “Apologies,” the twin said. Even his voice was nearly identical. “I did not mean to cause you distress,” the archangel said to her.

How was this her life?

“It’s fine,” she brushed the apology off. “Yes, I can see why it would be wise to introduce him to us instead of just showing up with him,” she told the worried-looking consultant. “You never mentioned having a twin before.”

“I haven’t been on Earth for a very long time,” the one that wasn’t Lucifer answered. “It likely did not seem relevant to him.”

“It really didn’t,” Lucifer agreed, shrugging. “If he had shown up, Michael would have just pretended to be me to avoid confusion, likely.”

“Pretended to be you?” Olivia asked, her head starting to throb. “So he can lie, then?”

She was starting to get an idea of where humanity had gotten the idea that Lucifer was the Prince of Lies from.

“I wouldn’t have corrected your assumption,” Michael shrugged, looking pleased by the question. “Yes, I can lie. I tend not to bother. It is pointless to lie when it is the Light that shines the truth into being.”

That was something that Olivia didn’t feel like touching with a ten foot pole, maybe not even a fifty foot pole.

Except she was the Chief of Police and it was her job to figure out how to deal with the supernatural elements that they had found among themselves. And if Michael was going to be around when Morningstar was around, she was going to have to put him on the payroll as well. Having two consultants, Devil and Angel, might be a good way to keep attention off of Smith, demon bounty hunter.

Olivia sighed and opened a drawer in her desk. Consultant paperwork was one of the first things she had made sure to have on hand, in case of a scenario like this one. “Fill this out,” she told the new arrival as she handed him the paperwork.

The absolute delight on Morningstar’s face was impossible to overlook. It made this mess almost worth it. All of the tensions she had been seeing their entire meeting was gone. In fact, the man was more relaxed than she had ever seen him in the entire time that she’d known him.

“What does it mean by Last Name?” the angel asked, reading the paperwork. “Do they mean the secondary family names humans give themselves? Is this why you introduce yourself with your title, Lucifer?”

“Title?” Olivia asked, curious despite herself. Sue her, she might as well get some enjoyment out of having to deal with this supernatural bullshit.

“Morning Star,” Morningstar explained. “Yes, Michael, humans require that there be a secondary name to distinguish themselves from others who share their ‘first’ name. Some have a third name that comes before the secondary last name.”

“Ah,” Michael nodded, looking as if he understood. It was the same face that Lucifer made when he definitely did not understand. Olivia snorted, lightly, before shaking her head. Both angels ignored her, intent of filling out the paperwork. It was probably one of the few times that Morningstar would ever consent to filing paperwork, really.

“Don’t worry about personal identification,” she told them as the explanation of social security numbers and driver’s licenses reached its first logical loop. “We’ll fill that later, when you’ve been given some.”

She didn’t bother with birthdate. She was already going to have to fix the one that Morningstar had used, as it was obviously faked. She’d known it was fake even when he’d put it down. The way he’d had to check his driver’s licenses had given it away. At the time, she’d brushed it off at the request of an FBI agent James Reicher, who had hinted that Morningstar was an assumed identity. No doubt someone who owed Satan a favor that had been called in.

That he’d offered to pull some strings in order to make sure that she gained status as Chief of Police had been the motivation that she needed to look the other way. When he’d proved to be the most effective consultant she’d ever hired, Olivia had decided that it wasn’t important that his identity was probably faked.

Showed how much she had known, didn’t it?

(She vaguely wondered what he would have said if she’d outright asked him if it was his real birthdate, not just the one that was listed on his official papers.)

Anyways, she was a bit interested in what the angel would put down.

It was probably going to be the most interesting consultant paperwork she’d ever read.

* * *

Michael was intrigued by the different humans that he was introduced to as Lucifer’s ‘work’. Most were somewhat off-put by his appearance, though they seemed to catch on to who was who quickly enough.

He wasn’t sure if it was familiarity with Lucifer or if it had to do with the difference in their clothing. It hadn’t taken long before most were referring to him by name.

Lucifer seemed delighted by the various humans that were approaching him to talk. There wasn’t a single case of hesitance when it came to conversing with his brother. Michael couldn’t help but feel the tension in his own body loosen the longer they were here.

These humans were relieved to see Lucifer in good health. It was obvious from the subtle once overs they gave him when they knew Lucifer wasn’t looking, searching for any sign of injury on his person. Michael watched as more than a few relaxed when they found no signs on Lucifer’s person.

These people saw his brother and loved him. If Michael had been prone to liking these humans before, he was more inclined after spending time amongst them.

Eventually, Lucifer wandered off in search of Ella Lopez. Michael debated following him for a moment, before deciding to allow his brother some time alone with his human friend. Ella Lopez was not a threat and Michael was still in the same building as Lucifer if trouble arose.

Mostly, he was curious about these humans that loved his brother enough to announce to the world that they would not be turning Lucifer away.

“I have to ask,” one finally said to him. The human was male and of a more stocky build. Sandy brown hair with bright brown eyes. “I know Morningstar has that desire mojo of his, but what about you? Can you get people to spill their ‘greatest desires’ as well?”

Ah yes, Michael had heard that Lucifer had been using his power of Will to bring out desires in humans. It was a creative use to his aspect that didn’t result in the complete control over the humans ability to act freely. He wasn’t not forcing them to do or act on anything, just uncovering to truth about their own hidden Wills.

When word of it had first reached Michael, he’d been a bit curious if he too could do something similar, much like this human was. It had taken some time and practice to understand what it was that he could do, however he eventually was able to make a similar technique to Lucifer’s.

Lucifer was Will and Truth, which is what allowed him to compel desire even when he was not strictly trying to. Michael was Darkness and Power, and he was more than aware that he inspired fear and fight or flight instincts in humans with his very presence. He was embarrassed to say that he hadn’t immediately made to connection to what his own ‘mojo’ would be.

“I cannot compel humans to admit to their greatest desires,” Michael answered slowly, considering. Did he want to tell these humans what it was that Michael could force them to admit to? They seemed relaxed enough around Lucifer, who had a far worse reputation to humanity than Michael did. At the same time, he wasn’t sure that these human would appreciate having their fears broadcast to everyone around them should Michael wish them to.

“That is not a no,” another human said, this one looking far more interested in the answer than the first has been. A human female, tall with muscles, blond hair and green eyed. Her soul was bright to Michael’s eyes, with very few patches of darkness coloring it compared to most humans of her age. Interesting. “Don’t tell me you’re as bad of a liar as Lucifer, because I was pretty sure that was impossible.”

Michael laughed. Oh yes, he liked this one. “Lucifer is incapable of lying,” Michael informed her. “I merely do not see the point in doing so.”

“Incapable, huh?” an older gruffer man mused. This one was shorter than the woman, with a more colored soul. Not with sin, just life experience. His hair was gray and his eyes a bright blue. “I suppose that explains a lot. I never met anyone who was as bad as lying as Morningstar before. Not surprised that he just can’t lie in general.”

Not a single accusation of Lucifer pretending to be a bad liar, just acceptance his Twin was incapable of it. Michael was beginning to understand why Lucifer was as attached to this place as he was.

“Still didn’t answer the question!” the woman reminded him, face intent. “If you can’t draw out desire, what can you draw out?”

Stubborn, Michael noted with amusement. “Would you like a demonstration?” he said after a moment of contemplation.

These humans were fond of Lucifer. If Michael was going to work with them alongside his brother, it would be better that they know what he is capable of now.

“Yes, I would,” the woman said, grinning in triumph. “Go on then, hit me with it.”

Michael looked into this human woman’s eyes and found the primal instincts that drove all animals. He prodded it, finding that hidden spot where thought and instinct combined into a fear that only higher functioning beings could feel. Animals that lived more than just the day to day survival, who communicated and loved in a way microscopic life could not hope to, creatures who had souls. “What is your greatest fear?” he asked as he pulled on the hidden darkness, calling it to him as all Dark obeyed his command.

Her breathing hitched and her face paled. He could hear the blood pounding in her veins as her body responded to the threat that he was. “Leaving my brother behind with no one to take care of him,” she whispered. Just like that, Michael released his grip on that darkness, allowing it to be pushed back where the Light barely reached.

“That is terrifying,” the first human, the one who had originally asked, said. Michael glanced at the human, surprised to find no terror on his face. Instead, there was a wide grin. “Oh man, I can’t wait to see what both of you could get out of a perp in interrogation. It was pretty fucking cool with just Morningstar. The two of you together? Our confession rate is going to sky rocket.”

“It’s pretty savage,” the human woman agreed, her heart rate still high. She did not seem to be afraid of him, however. Michael found that even more interesting. The few humans he had done this to before had not reacted nearly so positively to him afterward.

Perhaps Michael had been overly worried about Lucifer when amongst these humans.

When his Twin eventually rejoined him, Michael was much more positive about allowing these humans around Lucifer. If they could handle Michael, it was unlikely they would find his Twin off-putting.


	4. Michael is Not Allowed To pt 1

“No,” Richards said, sighing into his hands.

For once, the instigator of his exasperation was not one Lucifer Morningstar. Not that you could tell that by appearance.

It would figure that the Devil’s Twin would be just as frustratingly aggravating as Satan. Only with an added bonus of every instinct in your body screaming that there was a terrifying predator staring you down and you should run, you idiot, _run._

Whoever said Satan was the one to be worried about clearly was experiencing a case of mistake identity. Richards struggled endlessly to match some of the stories about the Devil to the real man. Matching them to Michael?

That was much easier. Richards could definitely understand a feeling of impending doom and destruction when it came to the Sword of God. And while Michael didn’t lie, his definition of what he considered lying was much looser than the average person. Not clarifying things, lies of omission, smiling when someone addressed him as Lucifer, and picking and choosing what he wanted to say in a way that most people would call lies.

Michael had once told Monroe that he’d seen Maze go down to holding when she was looking for him. What he hadn’t said was that he’d seen her do that five hours ago and she was currently in the lab with Lopez. The rest of the world would have called that lying but to Michael, it wasn’t. He just hadn’t said _when_ he’d seen her go down to holding. Just that he had.

Morningstar had been laughing his ass off the moment Monroe had figured out what had happened on her way back up from Holding. Since then, she was pretty careful which Twin she was asking information from. She wasn’t the only one that had fallen for that either.

When you got used to straight answers or creative dodges that came from Morningstar, it was hard to adjust to the less restricted Michael. As far as they could tell, if it was a direct mistruth, Michael didn’t consider it lying.

Prince of Lies indeed, Richards snorted to himself. At least they had the answer to how _that_ name had come about. If no one knew you were a twin and that your twin pretended to be you at times, of course they would assign you such names. At least Lucifer seemed to know that Michael was being fast and lose with his definition of what lies were.

“It would make this process faster,” the pain in his ass said while Morningstar ate his ‘stolen’ pudding and watched.

“You are not assaulting the suspects,” Richards said, pointing his finger at the angel.

“I wouldn’t be physically attacking their person,” Michael protested, frowning. Morningstar snorted as he took another spoonful of pudding.

“Throwing them into magical shadows to scare answers out of them is still assault!” Richards said slowly, hoping that maybe if he repeated it enough times it would eventually sink in.

“It would be faster,” the angel said, trying a new angle.

Dear lord, it was like dealing with Morningstar when he was hyped on whatever new drug he thought might be interesting to try. Only there was more menace and deliberate mangling of the truth involved.

Being dropped in shadow dimensions still counted as physical attacks on their person no matter if Michael was physically interacting with the person with his own hands. Was this what dealing with politicians was like?

Either way, Richards had a new respect for what God would have had to deal with regularly. If this was what Michael and Lucifer were like, he couldn’t even begin to imagine the chaos the rest of the Angels caused in Heaven.

“No, you are not using your shadow powers on people unless there is threat to lives that requires it,” Richards stressed. Michael moved to say something else. “Already dead people do not count as threat to lives!”

The angel shut his mouth and sulked.

Morningstar continued eating his pudding, looking all the world like he was an innocent bystander that wasn’t enjoying the fuck out of this. Must be nice to be a witness instead of being on Michael’s side of this conversation.

“What if I only threaten to use my shadows?” Michael asked, cocking his head to the side. “I wouldn’t be assaulting them if I was not using my shadows directly on them.”

He sounded so proud of his new thought.

Lucifer grinned at Richards from the side.

“That is coercion and is still not allowed,” Richards said, dropping his face into his hands.

He was going to have to start a fucking list, wasn’t he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look, I'm alive!
> 
> Seriously though, I'm in my last semester at college for my Bachelor's. My easiest class is a 300 level and I'm taking six classes. Sleep is for the weak. And those that aren't also planning exhibitions that go public in April and will be in a perpetual state of panic until then!
> 
> If I die, college is to blame. College and an unhealthy amount of caffeine with little sleep. Maybe poisoning from when I inevitably stick my paintbrush in my pop and don't notice. That's sure to happen one of these days considering my art 'studio' is really just my bedroom. 
> 
> I am working on the next main installment as well as another minific. Not sure when either will go up, considering how long the main fics can get or what makes more sense plot wise. Once I have them up, there'll be a few deleted scenes that I can add to the compilation fic. Some are basically full fics in their own right so there'll be a good amount of content going up at once. Just have to survive past the end of my degree before it can happen!
> 
> Hope you're all doing well and that you enjoyed these three baby chapters!  
> ~MisteryMaiden~


	5. Rules and when they matter 2

“Oh for the love of-” Jenis cut himself off before the end of the sentence. Certain phrases were a lot harder to use when you knew God was real and could be listening in at any time. The amusement of Morningstar’s face told him that the angel was enjoying their consternation at invoking his father’s name. At least he was getting some enjoyment out of the ‘outing’ of celestials to the world, Jenis sighed.

“Okay, let’s try this again,” he said, promising himself that he’d get a drink later. Fucking hell, Morningstar’s therapist deserved a fucking medal if this was the shit she had to put up with all the time. For a supernatural being of indeterminant age, sometimes Jenis felt like he was trying to explain common sense to a brain damaged toddler with ADHD.

Could angels have ADHD? It would certainly explain a lot…

“I don’t care that you are potentially bullet proof,” he said. “Just because getting shot probably won’t hurt you, and I have doubts considering I remember you getting shot being an issue at some point, that doesn’t mean you can walk right up to a gunman!”

Morningstar moved to say something.

“No,” Jenis said, point his finger at the man. “I don’t want an explanation of why that no longer applies. Frankly, I don’t care. That doesn’t mean that you should just waltz up to a maniac with a gun because you can. Even if he can’t hurt you, that doesn’t mean he might not change targets to one of the hostages. Hostages who a very much not bulletproof!”

Thank God, Jenis thought with a little irony as Morningstar paused, considering that point. If his own safety wouldn’t change his mind, pointing out the risk to the hostages would at least get him to consider it.

Michael, for his part, seemed to be considering this argument as well. As the other bulletproof individual in this team, the Archangel had been just as confused about why they couldn’t just walk in and take the gunman out themselves.

“Then what is the plan of action?” Satan asked, cocking his head in curiosity.

“Negotiations,” Jenis said, gesturing to the phones that were being set up around them. “We find out what they want, then we try and talk them down.”

“If we can’t provide what it is they want?” Michael asked, frowning.

“Then we pretend we can until they believe it,” Jenis said, speaking slowly. “And then, the moment we’re able, we save the hostages. The hostages are our priority.”

“Right, then!” Morningstar clapped his hands together, looking positively gleeful. Considering his ability to spin the truth, Jenis wasn’t all the shocked at his delight. “Where do we start?”

Jenis had the feeling that God was currently laughing at him.

* * *

It had happened so fast.

The negotiations had gone bad. Very bad.

Their hostage taker had no interest in money, escape, or anything that could be handed over.

He wanted immortality. He’d put together just how old _Cain_ had been as the inventor of murder and wanted to same ability. Didn’t matter that the angels didn’t have that kind of power or that Cain had eventually died. No, he wanted to avoid death and thought Lucifer or Michael could give him that.

Jenis wanted to scream common sense into the man. From the look of fury on Lucifer’s face and the cold menace radiating from Michael, neither angel was happy with this situation either.

That was when Harold Stan informed them that he would be killing hostages until then complied. Starting with the three-year-old and her mother.

The decision wasn’t hard to make. Not when there was not other way to save the lives of two people.

Jenis looked at Morningstar. “Forget what I said earlier. Go for it.”

Just like that, the two disappeared. Gunshots echoed from inside the building as screams sounded.

Except it didn’t stop at two gunshots. Jenis could seven more before everything went quiet.

For two long minutes, the LAPD and their FBI counterparts, who had arrived on scene not long after being called, watched in shock as hostages flooded out of the building. The last two to emerge was the mother with her little boy held tight in her arms. She was crying and clutching the child to her body as she ran.

Finally, once the hostages were quickly moved away from the building, the two angels stepped out. Dragged behind them was Stan, who was most definitely unconscious.

As the FBI moved forward to take custody of the man, Jenis sighed to himself in relief. Then he took a good look at Morningstar’s clothing.

There were seven holes in his suit coat. The Devil was looking at them with a morose sadness, as there was no way to save the clothing article. Beside him, Michael looked smug. Jenis was pretty sure he knew which one had knocked the man out.

Looks like it was his turn to stock the pudding, Jenis thought with a grin.


	6. Azrael

In the wake of Michael’s appearance and Lucifer’s status reveal, Olivia Monroe was not completely surprised that more angels felt comfortable appearing within the LAPD precinct. The first had, maybe understandably, been Raguel the Just. The angel of justice wasn’t that much of a stretch in comparison to Satan, so Olivia had just tossed a packet of paperwork at him and been done with it.

It would probably be for the best if angels that seemed likely to show up unexpectedly were put down as assets to avoid any legal fuss in the long run. Amenadiel already had his own paperwork filled out and on her desk before Monroe even thought to update their files (considering the angel was most definitely _not_ human).

Out of the five angel currently acting as delegates to humanity, it did not escape her attention that she had four of them as consultants for her police department.

If Olivia was smug about that, then it stayed between her and the Mayor of Los Angeles. Right alongside the tiny fact that they had a demon on payroll, though Olivia wasn’t stupid enough to think that it wouldn’t come out eventually.

Mazikeen, thankfully, was far more easier to hide than Lucifer. The fact that all of her bounties adored the ground she walked on made things far easier in the long run.

Honestly, that really should have been the first clue they all had that Smith was as human as Morningstar, which is to say, not at all. Hardened criminals didn’t tend to be taken with the people that were bringing them in. Especially not to the point that they vouched for her character. The only thing Olivia could say in her defense was that she’d spent the last few years dealing with Lucifer Morningstar and her ability to deal with insane bullshit had increased to impossible levels of ‘I can’t be bothered to give a shit anymore’.

It was with that mindset that Olivia Monroe heard the news about the Angel of Death hanging around in the forensics lab. Sighing, she grabbed the newly minted paperwork created in order to deal with the angels and left her office.

Appearing down in the forensics lab, sure enough, what could only be an angel was chatting happily with Lopez. Of course it was Lopez, she thought with another large sigh.

The scientist didn’t notice her first, which was par for the course. Out of all their forensic scientists, Lopez was easily the most likely to become completely engrossed in something to the point that everything around her was secondary. It was practically a right of passage in the labs to startle the woman bad enough that she dropped something. It was a miracle, maybe even a real one, that no evidence had ever been destroyed because of it.

The Angel of Death flashed her a bright smile that finally let Lopez know she had approached. Before anything could be said, Olivia dropped the paperwork onto the table. “Help her fill that out,” she said, motioning to the angel. “I’ll expect it on my desk before the next get together.”

Lopez saluted, grin wide on her face. “Will do, boss!”

“Ah, the infamous paperwork,” the angel grinned brightly. Olivia could recognize a familiar mischief in that smile that told her this was one of the angels she needed to watch out for. “Think I could get Lulu to help me fill it out?”

“Ten bucks says you can’t,” Lopez said quickly, a similar grin spreading across her face.

“Twenty says I can,” the angel said, a glint entering her dark eyes. “And if I win, I get half the share of your stash.”

Lopez smirked. “Fine, then if you lose, I get help in a prank on Maze.”

Yep, she wanted nothing to do with this. “Don’t break my precinct,” she said, glaring at them both. That done, Olivia turned around and walked away.

If later that day, there was swearing coming from a certain not-actually British consultant, Olivia played dumb.

When the paperwork appeared on her desk, filled out in familiar handwriting, Olivia stared at it before filing away the name at the top. If this Azrael could get Morningstar to actually fill out paperwork for once, then that was something to remember.

Besides, explaining to the Mayor and Governor how she managed to get the Angel of Death as a willing consultant was payment enough for the headache she was certain this newest angel was going to cause.

That smile had been far too similar to Morningstar’s for comfort.


End file.
